Adoption Update: We've Been Selected!

There's no point in trying to be cleverly vague about our good news. Most of you will have probably heard by now, but Brookie and I were selected by a birth mother in Nebraska and we found out Thursday, just before lunch.

On Monday, Brookie and I were talking on the phone, like we do every day before lunch. While on the phone, a email arrived in my inbox from itsaboutlove.org. It was from a birth mother saying that she was interested in talking with us and that she was due in January. Another email arrived almost simultaneously which included her phone number, which she had forgotten to put in her first email.

This wasn't the first email we had received. A little over a month ago, we received a communication from a birth father that asked us if we would be interested in taking their child. Before replying I called our adoption agent and asked for some guidance. He instructed us that when we replied to be sure to include a suggestion that they contact our agency. So in my reply I told them a little about ourselves, asked where they lived, and told them that LDS Family Services was handling our adoption, and that they should get in contact with the office nearest to them. We never heard back from that couple.

So when this email arrived Monday we called our agent again. I left a message saying that we were going to give her a call Monday night, and that we would keep things simple, and start trying to guide her to a local LDSFS office. He called back later that day and told us that he had actually already met this woman a few times, showed her our profile and collage, and that she had expressed interest in us. It was nice to know that her contact wasn't as random as the previous email we'd received and that she was already working with the agency through the process on her end.

I emailed her back saying that we would love to chat with her and told her we would call that night at 7:00pm. That evening there was a member of our ward that needed help moving things from a large trailer into her house. I went to help, and didn't get home until 7:25pm, so we called her right away. She didn't answer. We were a little worried that maybe she thought we were flakes for calling later than we had said we would call. We left a message and told her she could call us back anytime. We tried again Monday night, but still no answer.

The next day, she called my cell phone just before lunch time. We talked for about 25 minutes. Neither of us really knew what to say. I started off by telling her a little about ourselves and how we came to live in Kansas City. She asked some questions, and I answered. One of her biggest concerns was how we would feel about adopting a bi-racial child. She is Caucasian and the birth father is African-American. I assured her that race had absolutely no bearing on whether or not we would adopt a child, and she expressed her relief that we feel that way.

When we were through, I suggested that she give Brookie a call at work, which she did. Their conversation was a little more emotional that mine had been with her, I'm sure. They also spoke for about 20-25 minutes.

Then we waited.

She had mentioned that there was at least one other couple with which she wished to chat. We had been in this type of situation before. This time we were one of two couples, 50-50 odds. Last time we were close to adoption, in late August, we were one of three. The waiting part isn't much fun.

We waited the remainder of that Tuesday. Then we waited all day Wednesday. She had made it seem that she was close to making a decision, so we thought that we would hear from our agent either way.

Then, on Thursday, at about 11:00am, our agent called and gave me the good news that we had been selected. We have prayed and fasted so hard for this to come. Our family and our friends have prayed and fasted on our behalf. For over four years, and longer, the one blessing that we truly desired was to have children. We've been preparing for adoption for about 18 months, but in the moment that our agent told me that we had been chosen, it was, like, wow. Okay. Uh... wow.

I called Brooke at work and let her know. She was in shock. Our agent told us that maybe we should talk it over and pray about it. We offered a prayer of sincere gratitude, Brooke in the conference room of the middle school office, and me in our bedroom. When Brooke was finished she called me and told me that I could call our agent back and tell him we were on board and ready to move forward, and that she was done working and was coming home early.

We spent the bulk of Thursday evening calling friends and family spreading the good news. Here are some of the details: The birth mother is due January 22, and she's having a boy. She lives in northern Nebraska, so it's about an eight-hour drive from Kansas City.

Now all we need to do is work with the lawyers and get everything in order. We'll need to stay in Nebraska for anywhere from 4-5 days to 2 weeks, to comply with Interstate Compact laws.

We're glad we have some time to get things ready at home. We have seven weeks until the due date. There are all sorts of logistical things that we'll need to work out, but I'm sure that every thing will turn out fine.

We are so, so excited to given this chance to adopt and finally be the parents we've always wanted to be. I know that these scriptures in Isaiah are about the Savior's birth, but listening to Handel's Messiah this morning, I couldn't help but think how personal the words are to us at this time:

"For unto us a child is born; unto us a son is given..."


Go to the board!